150. In Lieu of Flowers
A while ago, a friend shared a post on WhatsApp with me that he had encountered somewhere, which was wonderfully unusual but hit me hard.
I copied that poem, if you call it one.
He mentioned that the poem is included in Shawna Lemay’s book, The Flower Can Always be Changing, which he hasn't read, and the poem was accompanied by a commentary stating, “A few years ago, I read a friend’s father’s obituary on Facebook. His father requested in lieu of flowers, please take a friend or loved one out for lunch.”
I have no idea who Shawna Lemay is or about the book in question, but all good things must be loved and shared.
Why did it come to my mind today? Yes, there is a reason.
While writing Brigitte Bardot's obituary, I felt that whatever I knew from watching her on screen or reading about her, she would likely share the same sentiment today, before leaving this world this morning.
So read it here -
Although I love flowers very much,
I won’t see them when I’m gone.
So in lieu of flowers:
Buy a book of poetry written by someone still alive,
sit outside with a cup of tea, a glass of wine,
and read it out loud, by yourself
or to someone, or silently.
Spend some time with a single flower.
A rose maybe. Smell it, touch the petals.
Really look at it.
Drink a nice bottle of wine with someone you love.
Or, Champagne.
And think of what John Maynard Keynes said,
“My only regret in life is that I did not drink more Champagne.”
Or what Dom Perignon said when he first tasted the stuff:
“Come quickly! I am tasting stars!”
Take out a paint set and lay down some colours.
Watch birds.
Common sparrows are fine.
Pigeons, too. Geese are nice. Robins.
In lieu of flowers, walk in the trees
and watch the light fall into it.
Eat an apple, a really nice big one.
I hope it’s crisp.
Have a long soak in the bathtub
with candles, maybe some rose petals.
Sit on the front stoop and watch the clouds.
Have a dish of strawberry ice cream in my name.
If it’s winter, have a cup of hot chocolate outside for me.
If it’s summer, a big glass of ice water.
If it’s autumn, collect some leaves
and press them in a book you love. I’d like that.
Sit and look out a window and write down what you see.
Write some other things down.
In lieu of flowers,
I would wish for you to flower.
I would wish for you to blossom, to open, to be beautiful.